in recovery

I have a confession: I am a recovering drama whore.
Not you! You may say upon reading this. But yes, it's true.

It is I who appear seemingly out of nowhere at the scene of any disruption asking - as if I could help - what transpired. It is I who knows, or will shortly know, who was weilding what when and what the police had to say about it.

I drudge through my life which sometimes feels more like Cinderella before the ball than a happily ever after, until I hear a siren. And then a little thrill surges through the marrow of my bones and I think "At last! Something's happening! Something exciting is happening." And if, perchance, the siren stops near our building... what luck!

Now, I am trying to abstain from drama. Just today I heard a siren and it stopped nearby and when I was leaving our parking lot for a legitimate errand, it turns out that there was an ambulance. Just down the street. But I did not give in to temptation. I turned the steering wheel away from whatever issue was happening and went to where I was supposed to go.

Once I got there... well... it turns out that some guy with a lot of tatoos had lost his phone. He'd set it down on a table next to his bag of Cheetos and then it was gone. Obviously someone had jacked it. I took him aside and told him exactly who I thought did it. He had been thinking the same thing! He decided that he was going to prevent her from leaving the scene, and frankly I concurred. I was starting to feel kind of shakey. I wasn't sure how we were going to tackle the situation. I didn't think I should physically restrain this woman, even though we both knew she was the perp. Damn it! I needed to get my husband involved. Unfortunately, he was more concerned about the possibility of falsely accusing someone than stopping her from getting away with it. The tatooed victim was getting more and more agitated. So was I. Thank goodness another guy got involved too. The girl was getting antsy. I informed the guys that she was going to make a break for it. My spouse didn't seem upset about that. It was at that point that I made an announcement to all present that a phone had been lost and if we could all take a moment to check around us, that would be very helpful. Then the victim decided to confront the thief. She backed away from him nervously. I turned to another friend for support. "Something's about to go down." I said tersely. "I'm not involved in this." she replied.

What?!

Slowly, clarity began to filter into my adrenaline infused brain.

It dawned on me how close I had come to tackling an allegedly innocent young woman over an allegedly stolen phone which was not even mine. Which belonged to a man who I did not actually know before we started talking about his phone.

And as I watched the scene unfolding, I began to wonder if I'd backed the wrong horse. Because by now the guy's shirt was off. I don't know why he took off his shirt. My husband asked me if I knew why he took off his shirt and I really don't know.

Anywhoooo...
turns out the girl didn't have the phone on her. The police arrived. I quietly made my way to my car. And as I watched the shirtless man gesticulating ardently to a taciturn cop, I drove demurely out of the parking lot.

Oh well. Tomorrow's another day.
Tomorrow I won't get involved in a drama.
One day at a time, starting Tuesday.
(You have to take into account that it's Memorial Day weekend and I can't control the shit that goes down on a holiday weekend.)